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Euros and Box Cover Art: The Albrecht Durer Syndrome
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(Disclaimer: I was no Art History major (I actually wanted to get a job out of college), so the following comments may be full of crap.) It seems that Euro games have not only a plethora of--for lack of a better word--fugly box covers, but seem to often be simplistic variations on the same basic elements one can find in Albrecht Durer's self portrait of 1497 (make sure to scroll to the side in order to see the full glory of Albrecht's painting):
1. Some guy--preferably dressed in flowing, colorful, and gaudy garb--in the foreground.
2. The subject must also be angled to the side, facing away from the viewer, but looking at them.
3. The main color must be brown. There are no exceptions to this rule. All other colors must either be variations of brown, or complimentary colors. Consult your color wheel.
4. The background must resemble an expansive, pastoral landscape, preferably with brownish-green moors, maybe crumbling castles in the distance, and perhaps some sort of action that obliquely depicts economic activity (this is probably the one thing that hints at what you'll be doing in the game).
5. The subject must be "the man." You as the viewer must immediately be aware that you are looking at an alpha male, condescendingly taking the time out of their hectic and important schedule to cast their gaze on you. Or, as a replacement for this rule, it just has to be a man.
6. The man must have a slightly misshapen head.
The following Euro game covers exemplify my point. They all use some variation of the rules above, some more than others. Please add others that you see to be using the rules state above, and thanks for reading.
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Posted Tue Nov 20, 2007 10:42 pm
Edited Wed Nov 21, 2007 7:29 pm
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1.
Board Game: Caylus
[Average Rating:8.02 Overall Rank:10]
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Here we see the classic Albrecht Durer Syndrome: Self-important man posturing at an angle, not sure how formally he should pose. Gaudy, billowy dress, with pastoral landscape in background. Brown, with the one color that is most different from brown yet compliments it: blue.
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2.
Board Game: El Grande
[Average Rating:8.02 Overall Rank:9]
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Self-important man (in this case men) posing at an angle: 10/10.
Pastoral landscape: Most definitely.
Brown: Swimming in it.
Slightly misshapen heads: Two of 'em.
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3.
Board Game: Goa
[Average Rating:7.84 Overall Rank:20]
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Brown: contrasted nicely with a Halloween brown-orange.
Important man: check (bonus points for ruffled shirt and smirking smile).
Pastoral landscape: Eh, not as bucolic or arcadian as the others, but you have an idealized vision of history, depicting the hustle and bustle of stuff-trading. Not a stretch.
This one places a nice variation on Durer's piece, by mirroring the man to the other side. Also, the subject is less obvious, is it the dude in the funny hat, or the dudes making funny poses in the background?
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Another classic with variation. I call it "Dude in foreground, with other dudes." This one does not include a distinct frame, like El Grande.
Pastoral backdrop: Check.
Misshapen head: Enough to give your kid nightmares.
Brown: More variation that those above, but it's all over it. I especially like the oddly wood-sided cathedral/ rising above the stone houses surrounding it.
Self-importance of subject: of course, he's an army general or something, very generally pointing at a general spot on the map.
EDIT: On second thought - this may be too interactive for the Durer Syndrome.
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5.
Board Game: Medici
[Average Rating:7.29 Overall Rank:139]
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This one nicely mimics the medieval glow of the era's paintings.
Man cocked to the side, looking at the viewer: Yes.
Representation of economic activity: Yes.
Bonus points for shadowy foreground, nicely framed outdoors, and gaudy garb. B++ on the Durer Syndrome scale.
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This one plays on Durer's theme. It could almost be said to depict the painting of Durer's self-portrait.
Billowy, flowing dress: Check.
Shadowy, brown browns: Oodles.
Vague depiction of pastoral landscape: Yes, nicely done with blurring.
Misshapen head: I can't figure out if its too small or too big, but I know it's not "just right."
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This one is too easy.
Brown: Framed in poop.
Self-important man: The artist, in making sure the viewer "gets" that it's Da Vinci, ends up turning him into Moses.
Misshapen head: Not so mcuh, but there are misshapen bodies engaged in various action poses.
On a side note, what's up with the plastic palm tree?
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8.
Board Game: Ys
[Average Rating:7.16 Overall Rank:214]
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Dude cocked to the side, looking the viewer, beckoning them into an almost surreal world of mesmerizing economic activity. Castle in background. Billowy, outlandish clothes. Disney-style head. Again, too easy.
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This one is a relief compared to the clausterphobic environs of the above box covers. The brown is toned down, mainly to the road and skin color. Very pleasing overall.
Bucolic backdrop: Certainly.
Dude smirking in front of other stuff going on in background: Yes.
Misshapen head: the bust seems made of clay, squeezed by his white head wrap.
I like the donkey in this one. It almost seems like they're giving each other the evil eye, suspecting some sort of treachery.
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10.
Board Game: Agricola
[Average Rating:8.37 Overall Rank:1]
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Agricola was actually the game that inspired this list, although it is a much more modern rendition of Durer's artistic elements. There is nothing framing the picture, and its not indoors. However, there's a dude standing at an angle, on the side of the image, with a massively misshapen head, in front of a bucolic scene, complete with wife holding a pot of stuff with paws.
An air of satisfaction from the man imbues the image with warmth, if it weren't for the extremely limited brown and blue palatte. (Side note: the sheep's head is oddly and inconsistently illuminated with other items in the image).
In fact, this piece is so unconventional--surely pressing the boundaries of Euro game art sense--I would venture to guess the sheep takes the place of Albrecht's classic pose. Upon zooming in to inspect the obvious intelligent bent of the animals eyes, I am sure of it.
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How could you leave out the number 1 game? Maybe because "the man" is hiding on the spine.
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"The man"'s brother, perhaps.
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Can't believe you missed Puerto Rico. Snooty looking fellow? Check. Brown? Check. Abstract business in the background? Check.
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He's too busy taking care of business to look at us but other then that...
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This guy will take time out to pose for romance novels and to get laid. Notice the open shirt.
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Does it have to be a man? This might be an example. If not the box is full of cards that do qualify.
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This game has lots of cards that meet the description. As an art history major maybe you can tell me just what it is that I find so weird about the art on the cards in this game?
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Two editions, different approaches on the same standards.
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Not even games with fantasy themes are spared. 
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Surya Van Lierde is pure Eurosnoot and proud of it!
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He's not looking at you, but all the rest is perfectly in place!
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23.
Board Game: Shogun
[Average Rating:7.86 Overall Rank:21]
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Brown?
Brown!
Even Japan isn't safe from Dürer!
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Not even the aliens are safe.
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Brown, facing to the side but looking at the viewer, stuff going on in the background. Neh.
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Posted Tue Nov 20, 2007 9:43 pm
If only they'd stuck with the original cover, but alas they were reprimanded by the European Council on Board Game Covers and forced to conform more closely to the Albrecht Durer Syndrome.